Prebiotic Doom

We're overdue for some flavour of the minute junk releases, but in this case, one is attempting to buck the trend of being wildly unhealthy. Only one, mind you.

I wrote about Slice and its attempt at reading the room and not loading 45g of sugar into your gullet with each can, and there have been plenty of others also riding that bandwagon. With Pepsi buying Poppi and using it for movie promotions and the like, I was a bit skeptical when I heard that the flagship cola was also coming out in a healthy option.

That was a while back, and nothing appeared to come from it. That was until about a week or two ago when I saw them appear in the local grocery store. They were asking the usual $2.50 per can, which alluded to its place amoungst the other bacterial sodas… but something seemed amiss.

My spidey sense was correct. If you note the text on the can, it states that it's a prebiotic soda, not a probiotic soda. What's the difference? Well, prebiotics are ingredients that promote bacterial growth. Basically food for food, not an actual culture that will replace your gut biome after it was wiped out the one time you took antibiotics when you were seven.

Worse, it appears to be a corn-based concoction rather than some sort of root inulin, so we're swapping the corn syrup for some sort of powder. Not ideal.

How does it taste? Quite good actually. I suppose it's far better than the normal can of Pepsi, but I'm going to try and not let the pleasant taste coax me into turning this into a regular indulgence. The price would dissuade me, anyhow.

Onward to something that has no pretense of being healthy, nor even middle-of-the-road. Loaded with sugar and oils of nefarious origin, Oreos haven't had a place in my cupboard for some time.

Fitting that it sports the theme of Doom, although it's more certainly a tie-in to something in pop culture that I'm ignorant of. Didn't we already have a Fantastic Four movie, and wasn't the main villain the curly-haired woman who's been ruining many a movie lately? No idea.

It's supposed to have color-changing creme, so I was a bit underwhelmed when I saw that it's more of a double-chocolate affair. Not that double-chocolate is bad, but I can't imagine how much it will change color in such a starting phase.

I had to take one for the team and try, though. The package said to lick the creme, so after a series of acts that would make Melissa Etheridge blush, a whole lot of nothing happened.

As far as color changes go, anyway. My gut needed those probiotics to handle what I had just ingested, but I'm left to my own devices now. And I'm in a lot of pain. Help me.